The Breakthrough Meal

Any tubie mom knows the feeling you get when you walk into your child's room in the morning to get them out of bed and see this:

That sinking, stomach-in-your-throat, heart-in-your-belly feeling.  The feeling that you get when you know you have unwittingly deprived your child of 900 calories that he so desperately needs.  You can't give him those calories back if you want him to eat orally throughout the day, so they are lost, gone forever.

These things happen in the tubie world, and it's almost always a pump issue.  This time it was totally our fault.  A miscommunication between Shane and myself led to the lost calories, but it turns out that it was totally worth it.  

Our son was hungry today.  Hungry.  I saw him ferociously seek out the snacks in his therapist's bag when she arrived.  I saw him (without asking) rip open the baggie of crackers and instantly begin putting an entire cracker in his mouth, not taking his normal crumb-baby-bites.  I saw him ask Ms. Maria to eat instead of playing their normal games first.  Asking to eat.  

I watched him climb up into his chair at our table and pour the entire bag of mini Ritz crackers out on his plate and without blinking an eye popping them in his mouth like he'd been doing it for years.  I watched him grab other baggies of snacks that were laid out, open them, and pull out the contents, trying each one.  Feeling lucky, Ms. Maria and I added a tablespoon of peanut butter to a bowl, and I watched as he spread peanut butter on his mini crackers and ate them like he didn't have a sensory issue at all.  I even watched him  scoop heaps of peanut butter onto his little knife and bite it off.

In about 30 minutes, Greyson had devoured more than he has ever eaten in one sitting.  29 mini Ritz crackers, 1.5 Tbsp of peanut butter, 3 Ritz flatbread crackers, and 5 cheese balls.  308 calories.  

My child had a typical meal.  I'm not sure if this feeling can even be described appropriately.